?

Log in

No account? Create an account
spilled brain matter accomplices history of the disturbed inside a demented mind My Website Previous Previous Next Next
Torry is always saying that I watch too many movies. I think I may… - Speak Friend and Enter
Grammar and Lord of the Rings
suffocated
suffocated
Torry is always saying that I watch too many movies. I think I may have proved her right finally.

I thought about actually doing a review for The Replacements, that Keanue Reeves football flick about scab players that come in during a strike, but I realized that it'll be easier to explain why it's so bad. And why I watch too many movies.

See, apparently the makers of this film figured that the movies they ripped most of their material off of were so little seen that it wouldn't matter how much stuff they took from them. Add to that the fact that about the biggest stars either had amounted to Scott Bakula and Rick Moranis and you can see why it wasn't too big of a deal.

For those of you who don't know, The Replacements is, to summarize, about a professional football player strike and the players hired for one particular team to play the games during the strike. The coach is played by Gene Hackman, and he goes out and assembles the most ragtag bunch of guys you ever saw - including a cop, a convict, a former college player who never made it pro, a mini mart clerk, a sumo guy, a deaf guy and a couple bouncers. Because it's funny!!!! Anyway they have a bunch of zany misadventures and everyone lives happily ever after.

Now to why it's so dumb. Most of the movie is ripped off of a little heard about movie called Necessary Roughness - came out in the early 90s. This movie was about a college who was disgraced for violating NCAA rules and set about rebuilding from scratch. So the coaches go out and - you guessed it - recruit a ragtag bunch of guys, including an army enlistee, a samaurai, a Samoan, a quarterback who quit college when his dad died, a soccer player, etc.

Don't see the comparison yet? Well, here ya go.

In Necessary Roughness, a soccer player was recruited for placekicking. In The Replacements, a soccer player was recruited for placekicking. The difference? One was from England, one was a woman.

In Necessary Roughness, a big Samoan fat guy was put on the offensive line. In The Replacements, a big Sumo fat guy was put on the offensive line.

In Necessary Roughness, the team had a wide receiver who could fly but had terrible hands. In The Replacements, the team had a wide receiver who could fly but had terrible hands. More on that later.

In Necessary Roughness, the new team gets into a bar room brawl with the best team in the state who picks on them. In The Replacements, the new team gets into a bar room brawl with the regular players who pick on them.

Ok, thats off the top of my head. I'll keep going....

In Necessary Roughness, they eventually got the guy to catch by some miracle. Nothing major. However.....
In The Replacements, the wideout had to have some sticky stuff put on his hands to catch. In the huddle, he slaps them together and looks worried.

Ever see a movie called Little Giants? Didn't think so. It's about Pee Wee football, and the team coached by Rick Moranis is another rag tag team put together on the fly. They have a wide receiver who can fly but has terrible hands.

At one point he puts some kind of tar-like substance on his hands to catch, and then slaps them together in the huddle and looks worried.

Its bad when you're pulling material from a little kiddie movie nobody saw.

But hey, at least its not like Scary Movie, where 80% of the dialogue was lifted from the original script, and it STILL took 6 people to write the screenplay.
5 pity screws or Do me
Comments
jesterstear From: jesterstear Date: September 23rd, 2001 10:53 pm (UTC) (Link)
Oh god...

Scary Movie. There's 90 minutes of my life that I'll never EVER get back.

Now... anyone that reads my journal entries before 9/11 knows what a sick bastard I am. I love Saturday Night Live, Mystery Science Theater 3000, The Kids in the Hall, The Young Ones, Monty Python and a slew of other hillarious things. If there's one thing I'm not, it's humour-impaired.

I sat through Scary Movie after borrowing it on DVD from a friend of mine. Didn't smile. At all. Not even once.
shycomputerguy From: shycomputerguy Date: September 23rd, 2001 10:58 pm (UTC) (Link)
Dude, did you just do a review of the Replcaments? Damn, that's like trying to find meaning in a Pauly Shore movie.
suffocated From: suffocated Date: September 24th, 2001 07:10 pm (UTC) (Link)
3 comments and not one person bothered to say that I was so totally right.
slayergoddess From: slayergoddess Date: September 24th, 2001 01:41 pm (UTC) (Link)
So I take it that I am right? Well, yes too many movies my friend! And you we do not talk very often anymore on AIM.
suffocated From: suffocated Date: September 24th, 2001 07:10 pm (UTC) (Link)
I humbly bow before your mighty prophecising, madame.

You're right, we don't talk much, is that something we can remedy?
5 pity screws or Do me